Then to now…

Before my first 5K

A few nights ago I went out to dinner with my former coworkers and I got to thinking about some things.  I started working with them five years ago and realized that so much has changed since then.  It feels like all I did was blink and everything is so different.   There’s so much going on with me.  Is this growing up?  I’m recently finding myself after breaking off a three year live in relationship.  I’m heading back to grad college to study at New York University after five years of being out of school (yikes!).  I ran my first 5K last month.  I’m down nearly 100lbs.  I live on my own.  I still don’t drink.  I just hit my one year anniversary at a really awesome job in the city I live in.  I am a totally different person.  These all seem like normal things for a 26 year old right?  Wrong.  If you’ve known me you wouldn’t believe that this is where I am today.  Let’s backtrack so maybe you’ll understand where I came from:

1 Year Ago:  I landed my dream job in the city I was born and raised in after months of interviewing (score!).  My boyfriend and I celebrated hit two years together and I was realizing that this might not be it.

Me with my little brother Adam – Easter 2007

3 Years Ago:   On April 24, 2009, after a night of binge drinking before and during and after a softball game, I came home obliterated.  My sister put me to bed and I vomited in my sleep.  After that night, my family sat me down and told me if I didn’t clean up my act I wasn’t going to live much longer; think of it like a scene straight from the show INTERVENTION.  My little brother (who was 9 at the time) told me he didn’t like seeing me drunk and asked me to stop; that was the end of my partying. I met the man I would start my very first meaningful relationship with that I thought would lead to marriage.  Here comes the start of a new me.

5 Years Ago:  I graduated from college with honors and started working full time two months after.  I was one of the only ones out of my friends with a full time job and barely managed partying every night and working.  I drank every night, worked all day and had zero ambitions in life.  I was selfish, insecure and ran from my realities by partying. I was nearly a 100lbs heavier than I am today and made a very important decision to change that (stay tuned….)

7 Years Ago: I was taking migraine medicine that caused me to drop 80lbs in two months.  I didn’t eat and I was addicted to working out.  Two days before my 19th birthday, I drank a bottle of Jack Daniels on a very empty stomach and passed out.  Not only was I unconscious, in an attempt to change and put myself to bed I hit my head on the ceramic windowsill and probably had a concussion.  My blood alcohol level was .305 and I was in a coma for about six hours.  However, I still managed to make dean’s list.

10 Years Ago:  It was 2002, I was 16 and a junior in high school.  This was probably one of the worst years and a climactic point in my life.  It was high school – all the typical things happened to me: met my “first love,” went to proms, partied, had fun.  But honestly – this was probably the year I wish I could do over in all the years of my life.  We’ll get into more about this year at another time.

I chose to write about these very intimate and personal details about myself for my first “official” post because you should know where I came from first.  If you don’t know where I came from, how can you understand where I am going? I have a past, don’t judge me for it; look how it’s shaped my future.

So, there you have it.  Maybe you can see why all these things I’m doing right now aren’t minor events in my life.  These are a HUGE deal.  I could have been dead years ago.  This is my second chance year.  My year to do things I never had the chance to do.  No boundaries; no barriers.

You ready for this?


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